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The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them

3/5. Discussion by a clinician of what it means to be highly sensitive – she’s talking about having high perceptivity/reactivity here, not being thin-skinned – and how best to parent such children.

I read about half of this, skipping liberally, which is the treatment 99% of parenting books deserve. On the one hand, some of the things she describes did make me have that startled feeling of being seen – for Casterbrook, and also for little me, who didn’t like crowds or noise and who liked to think deeply about everything.

On the other hand, if you look at the works cited, um. It’s all her? She’s made this whole thing up? Out of her observations and experiences, sure, but let’s not pretend this is some scientific inquiry into a widely-accepted phenomenon (which she does, here and there). It’s a discussion of temperament, and how to parent a certain type the best. It did give me a few ideas for Casterbrook, but nothing I couldn’t have come up with myself.

Also, she identifies herself as a highly-sensitive person, and she’s really, really, really invested in how being one is a good thing. Not just, like, subjectively, but for humanity, guys. I get the urge to convince skeptical parents that their children’s feelings are real and valid – God knows my parents disrespected and trampled my feelings and bodily sensations basically constantly – but honestly. It’s all a bit much.

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